history's sappiest gays
Jan. 10th, 2019 10:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
casualbirdI've always been fascinated by LGBT history, feeling like almost a sacred form of study for me as a... huge queer. It brings me closer to my heritage, a story that is often erased. Tales of riots, of secret subversion, of the continual, immortal life force of the LGBT community serve to educate and inspire young LGBT people, inclusive of myself. But LGBT history, like any other sub-field of history, is not only a cohesive storyline spanning thousands of years, but a long and illustrious archive of the lives of really fascinating people. Sometimes, really, really fascinating people. And I think that the study of LGBT individuals themselves is the most rewarding part of this kind of study--not only does it remind me of the persistence of the LGBT community (as all of these people are so unwilling to be beaten down) but of the one truly critical fact of historical study. People were always people. And people always do interesting things. And really, is that not why history is good in the first place?
Anyway. Now that I've pulled all of that philosophizing directly out of my ass, I did come here to share some history with you. Tonight--the story of the sappiest couple ever committed to the historical record: King James I and VI, and George Villiers.
The story of how James and George met is a funny but slightly sleazy one, a beginning completely unbefitting the diabolically sweet romance that was to follow. Imagine that you are a vaguely creepy courtier in the court of James I. Imagine that the king is noticeably having trouble in his relationship with his favorite and obvious boyfriend, Robert Carr. Imagine that you don't like Carr, for reasons that I don't know and are presumably very boring. What do you do?
You know how gay the king is.
You exploit the bejesus out of this for political gain.
But how? You get the king on the rebound. You wave a cute boy in his face until he washes his hands of his old boyfriend completely.
The cute boy of the hour was George Villiers, a young man spending some time at court in the hopes of establishing himself in life. An ordinary courtier--except for the fact that he was, apparently, smoking hot. He was described, by someone who had presumably no desire to have sex with him, being that he was a bishop and honest-before-god named Godfrey Goodman, as being "the handsomest-bodied man in all of England." James himself described him as being "beautiful as a hunting leopard." I've never seen a hunting leopard, but that sounds good to me. (Why won't anyone tell me I'm as beautiful as a hunting leopard? Romance is dead.)
Anyway. See for yourself.
He has that look about him, that I find most portraits of old-fashioned gay people do. He looks like he knows something you don't. I wonder how much time he spent on his mustache before sitting for this portrait.
Either way, George caught James' eye at a hunt. The sleazy people decided that he might be useful to their end of getting Carr out. So what these people did was put poor Georgie through a whole-ass chick flick makeover montage, buying him a whole new wardrobe of king-seducin' clothes and lobbying him into the position of royal cupbearer so that he could talk to him.
It worked like fucking gangbusters.
The next year he was knighted, and made a Gentleman of the Bedchamber (not as sexy as it sounds). And then the next year, he was given a barony, became a viscount, and received the title of Master of the Horse, as well as becoming a Knight of the Garter. And this was a big deal--membership was by invitation from the King or Prince of Wales only, and only 24 people could hold the position at a time. He also got to wear a stupid blue garter for formal occasions, printed with the phrase "SHAME ON HIM WHO THINKS ILL OF IT" (presumably referring to the wildly ugly garter) in Old French.
The year after that, 1617, he was made an Earl, and 1618 was created the Marquess of Buckingham. In 1623, he was made the Duke of Buckingham, becoming the highest-ranking person in England outside of the royal family. Or inside of the royal family, because at some point I'm certain that he was (tawdry joke irresistible). This was the most meteoric rise to power in England in a century, and it was all because of him being as beautiful as a hunting leopard.
Or not--all accounts characterize James as being overwhelmingly taken with George. He made absolutely no secret of it, either. Anthony Weldon describes "the King's kissing them after so lascivious a mode in public, upon the theater, as of were, of the world, prompted many to imagine some things done in the retiring-house that exceed my expressions no less than they do my experience." Which... yeah. Another source, seeming far more on-board with the situation, described the king as "wondrous passionate," and stated that he "never yet saw a husband make so much or so great dalliance over his beautiful spouse as I have seen King James over his favourites, especially Buckingham."
In addition to all this smooshy PDA, James possessed the intensely relatable urge to shout "I'M GAY AND I LOVE MY PARTNER" from the rooftops, making this very brash and touching speech to his Privy Council in 1617. (The Privy Council is something like the president's cabinet.)
"I, James, am neither a god nor an angel, but a man like any other. Therefore I act like a man and confess to loving those dear to me more than other men. You may be sure that I love the Earl of Buckingham more than anyone else, and more than you who are here assembled. I wish to speak in my own behalf and not to have it thought to be a defect, for Jesus Christ did the same, and therefore I cannot be blamed. Christ had John, and I have George."
But the mushiest part was the letters they exchanged. Now, I cannot find the texts of these letters in full, probably because to read them in their entirety would cause some kind of hyper-romantic fit. Here are some quotes.
James wrote "I desire only to live in the world for your sake, and I had rather live banished in any part of the world with you, than live a sorrowful widow-life without you."
George, who seemed to absolutely reciprocate any and all sappiness described above (I just can't find as much about him, or gestures that he made, save these few quotes.), wrote this: "I naturally so love your person, and adore all your other parts, which are more than ever one man had."
He also wrote this: "I will live and die a lover of you."
How did these men survive before modern medicine, what with the maple syrup running through their veins?
James and George lived as close to a married life as they could have: they shared a bed regularly, with historians finding a secret passageway between their two rooms at a castle which they visited. James took a liking to George's children, and often played with them. James' own wife even entreated George to be true to her husband. (There's a lot there, but it is good evidence of their commitment.) George stayed with James until the end of James' life. He died holding George's hand.
And James... had a really cute nickname for George. Not sweetheart, not honeypie, not pookie... but Steenie. After... this is the sappiest thing I've ever heard in my entire life. After St. Stephen, who is said to have had the face of an angel.
Thank you for listening to me prattle on about history's most disgustingly devoted gay couple. That is all.
A note: did I source most of this information from Wikipedia? Yes, I did. I'm not turning this in. Fight me.
Anyway. Now that I've pulled all of that philosophizing directly out of my ass, I did come here to share some history with you. Tonight--the story of the sappiest couple ever committed to the historical record: King James I and VI, and George Villiers.
The story of how James and George met is a funny but slightly sleazy one, a beginning completely unbefitting the diabolically sweet romance that was to follow. Imagine that you are a vaguely creepy courtier in the court of James I. Imagine that the king is noticeably having trouble in his relationship with his favorite and obvious boyfriend, Robert Carr. Imagine that you don't like Carr, for reasons that I don't know and are presumably very boring. What do you do?
You know how gay the king is.
You exploit the bejesus out of this for political gain.
But how? You get the king on the rebound. You wave a cute boy in his face until he washes his hands of his old boyfriend completely.
The cute boy of the hour was George Villiers, a young man spending some time at court in the hopes of establishing himself in life. An ordinary courtier--except for the fact that he was, apparently, smoking hot. He was described, by someone who had presumably no desire to have sex with him, being that he was a bishop and honest-before-god named Godfrey Goodman, as being "the handsomest-bodied man in all of England." James himself described him as being "beautiful as a hunting leopard." I've never seen a hunting leopard, but that sounds good to me. (Why won't anyone tell me I'm as beautiful as a hunting leopard? Romance is dead.)
Anyway. See for yourself.
He has that look about him, that I find most portraits of old-fashioned gay people do. He looks like he knows something you don't. I wonder how much time he spent on his mustache before sitting for this portrait.
Either way, George caught James' eye at a hunt. The sleazy people decided that he might be useful to their end of getting Carr out. So what these people did was put poor Georgie through a whole-ass chick flick makeover montage, buying him a whole new wardrobe of king-seducin' clothes and lobbying him into the position of royal cupbearer so that he could talk to him.
It worked like fucking gangbusters.
The next year he was knighted, and made a Gentleman of the Bedchamber (not as sexy as it sounds). And then the next year, he was given a barony, became a viscount, and received the title of Master of the Horse, as well as becoming a Knight of the Garter. And this was a big deal--membership was by invitation from the King or Prince of Wales only, and only 24 people could hold the position at a time. He also got to wear a stupid blue garter for formal occasions, printed with the phrase "SHAME ON HIM WHO THINKS ILL OF IT" (presumably referring to the wildly ugly garter) in Old French.
The year after that, 1617, he was made an Earl, and 1618 was created the Marquess of Buckingham. In 1623, he was made the Duke of Buckingham, becoming the highest-ranking person in England outside of the royal family. Or inside of the royal family, because at some point I'm certain that he was (tawdry joke irresistible). This was the most meteoric rise to power in England in a century, and it was all because of him being as beautiful as a hunting leopard.
Or not--all accounts characterize James as being overwhelmingly taken with George. He made absolutely no secret of it, either. Anthony Weldon describes "the King's kissing them after so lascivious a mode in public, upon the theater, as of were, of the world, prompted many to imagine some things done in the retiring-house that exceed my expressions no less than they do my experience." Which... yeah. Another source, seeming far more on-board with the situation, described the king as "wondrous passionate," and stated that he "never yet saw a husband make so much or so great dalliance over his beautiful spouse as I have seen King James over his favourites, especially Buckingham."
In addition to all this smooshy PDA, James possessed the intensely relatable urge to shout "I'M GAY AND I LOVE MY PARTNER" from the rooftops, making this very brash and touching speech to his Privy Council in 1617. (The Privy Council is something like the president's cabinet.)
"I, James, am neither a god nor an angel, but a man like any other. Therefore I act like a man and confess to loving those dear to me more than other men. You may be sure that I love the Earl of Buckingham more than anyone else, and more than you who are here assembled. I wish to speak in my own behalf and not to have it thought to be a defect, for Jesus Christ did the same, and therefore I cannot be blamed. Christ had John, and I have George."
But the mushiest part was the letters they exchanged. Now, I cannot find the texts of these letters in full, probably because to read them in their entirety would cause some kind of hyper-romantic fit. Here are some quotes.
James wrote "I desire only to live in the world for your sake, and I had rather live banished in any part of the world with you, than live a sorrowful widow-life without you."
George, who seemed to absolutely reciprocate any and all sappiness described above (I just can't find as much about him, or gestures that he made, save these few quotes.), wrote this: "I naturally so love your person, and adore all your other parts, which are more than ever one man had."
He also wrote this: "I will live and die a lover of you."
How did these men survive before modern medicine, what with the maple syrup running through their veins?
James and George lived as close to a married life as they could have: they shared a bed regularly, with historians finding a secret passageway between their two rooms at a castle which they visited. James took a liking to George's children, and often played with them. James' own wife even entreated George to be true to her husband. (There's a lot there, but it is good evidence of their commitment.) George stayed with James until the end of James' life. He died holding George's hand.
And James... had a really cute nickname for George. Not sweetheart, not honeypie, not pookie... but Steenie. After... this is the sappiest thing I've ever heard in my entire life. After St. Stephen, who is said to have had the face of an angel.
Thank you for listening to me prattle on about history's most disgustingly devoted gay couple. That is all.
A note: did I source most of this information from Wikipedia? Yes, I did. I'm not turning this in. Fight me.
